Lost

Have you ever gotten close to getting something you want so much only to lose it because of one silly little mistake? If you made that mistake,you could tell yourself : "Okay,fine.My bad.I was wrong.Serves me right." But what if it wasn't you made that mistake? It was someone else.Your friend.Your sibling.Your relatives.Your parents. And they try to make it up to you by being super nice to you. How would you feel? Angry? Happy? Confused? Disgusted? Annoyed? Of course,one bad thing always follows another. If you think it's no big deal, how about if the person who made you lose the thing you wanted so much, got that thing instead? Now how would you feel? Would you be able to forgive that person? Would you be able to pretend nothing ever happened?

Maybe there are some saints out there that can achieve that.But for me...I don't know.I've waited so long for this thing...only to lose it all in a milisecond.All because someone said something without bothering to think about the consequences.It was so important to me but because of what someone said,I lost it and they got it instead. Of course,this person was sorry and tried to make it up to me by being nice to me but what was the point? The damage was done. It only made me hate them more.

I guess that thing just wasn't meant to be mine.But it still hurts,you know.I thought that I could laugh it off.Forget it.But I was wrong.Everytime I think about it,I get so mad.

14 June 2007.Officially the worst day of my life.I feel so lost.

Sad.

p.s. Vidya,Milo happens to be my favourite drink in the world thank you very much. You should try eating the powder with bread. It tastes nice.


--- JM ---