Attempt at Procrastination #2

My parents have this horrible habit.

When they want me for something, they keep calling me until I either shout the place down in response or actually get off my backside and go to see what they want.
And I'm serious, they just keep at it.
Drives me crazy.

Example :

They'd be all like

Mohl! (they don't call me by name) (we have weird nicknames, don't question it)

And I'd be all

Yea?

And instead of answering, they just repeat

Mohlll!

And I'm like

Yes?!

MOHLLL

omg ok I'm coming!

MOOHHHHLLLLLLL

I'M COMING

MOOOOOHLLLLL

Oh for fucks sake, I'M COOOOMIIIINGGGG


By then of course, it just sound intensely sexual.
And then it would be awkward to let it continue....so I have to get up and see what they want.

For someone with a non-existent sex life, I have a very dirty mind.

Of course, I don't shout the swearing bit.
I don't swear at home.

Good girl, much?



The first (and only) time I ever swore at home was when I was 9, and I was getting annoyed over some Maths question.
(I remember this scene in explicit detail ok)

And I just went "shit!" out of my frustration.
(Maths can be very frustrating when you're 9 ok)

And my mother just swooped down out of nowhere and gave me one tight slap
and went "DON'T YOU EVER SWEAR IN MY HOUSE AGAIN"
in all her dramatic scorned-Indian-mother glory.



I'm not exaggerating, that's exactly how it happened.

No forewarning,
no "what was it you said?"
no "omg did you just swear in my house?"

Nothing.

Just PAH-DAAAAAM (I swear that's how it sounds when they slap themselves in movies) one tight slap.
And "DON'T YOU EVER SWEAR IN MY HOUSE AGAIN"



That's it.

And it worked.

I never swore in the house again.



That's not to say I didn't swear outside.
I vaguely remember a period in time where we sought to add "fuck" into every sentence we spoke.
Because it was cool.
At the time.
But in all honesty, I was 13 years old,
and you're allowed to do more stupid things at 13 than is justifiable at any other age.



Sigh. Half a case summary left.
I tweeted something about it, and Dr Sheila, and Shivani ventured that the tweet reminded her of Sheila Ki Jawani.

Dr Sheila and Sheila Ki Jawani.

*insert random mental image here*

And now I can't get it out of my head.

I hate my imagination sometimes.




And when it's all said and done, sometimes I think I should have been born a boy. My thinking seems to fit in much better with that of the male population.

Sometimes I disgust myself.




Better get back to my case summary if I want to watch the second-half!

By my calculations...that gives me an hour.

Great.




~vid~