3 Blind Mice: Seven facts worth knowing about cockroaches.

NEW FACEPALM GIF.

I'm addicted to gifs.
I'm also Captain Obvious :DDDD

And I am SO insanely bored right now...

I wanted to pee earlier.
But then when I went to the bathroom, there was a cockroach inside.

Cue closing the door quietly, backing away quietly, and then screaming and running.
...we've already agreed I'm a bit mad :D

Thats not the worst part.

The worst part is : NO ONE WILL KILL THE COCKROACH FOR ME.

They're all like : You're 20 years old, you must learn to kill cockroaches by yourself.
...
Wut.
No like, seriously...WUT.

(Like, seriously is my new favourite phrase. ...aaaand Capt Obvious makes a reappearance.
Don't you like, just LOVE me? :DDD)

I haz a theory btw.
Regarding cockroaches of course *nods sagely*

The possibility of a cockroach appearing out of nowhere and staring you in the face (or foot, considering their eye level)
is directly proportional
to how badly you want to pee after everyone else (who is capable of killing the cockroach) has gone to bed.

Facts about the cockroach :

1. A roach can live a week without a head.
Even if you cut off its head, it would still run around the house for about a week before dying of thirst because its brain is not in its head. It’s scattered throughout its body.
Oh ew. Now you can't even be secure about killing them.

2. Cockroaches have white blood.
K. People have told me this before,
but lemme share story : There was this once when my darling brother decided to stomp hard on a cockroach in front of me, to prove that cockroach blood is green.
Which he did.
And the cockroach got crushed.
And there was green stuff oozing out of it all over the floor. (yuck)
Which is why, for quite some time, I was convinced cockroach blood is green.
I'm confused now.
And now he wont stomp on another cockroach for me to double check. No one else will either.
Tis apparently destined to remain one of my life's mysteries.
-_-

I'm losing the plot here.
Why did I start posting about cockroaches again?

Nevertheless...

3. A cockroach that has just shed it's skin is white and has black eyes.
It takes 8 hours to reproduce the skin layer.
I've never seen a white cockroach. o_O
Have you?? And how on earth do you see its eyes anyway?

4. It's hard to sneak up on a roach.
They have one great big nerve connecting their tails to their heads, alerting them to danger from behind.
They have nerves. Okay one nerve, but still.
They have a nerve. What the actual eff?

5. Cockroaches do not bite. False.
The larger roaches have even been known to bite humans.
AHHHH.
SEE. This is why we run!
They are dangerous okay!

6. Roaches have faster reflexes than humans--even faster than Michael Jordan's.
Like. They bite. AND they have super reflexes.
Andddd they can live without their heads.
How was it we were the higher species again?

7. LAST FACT : Cockroaches have medicinal properties.

Crushed cockroaches when applied to a wound, can help ease the sting
Processed cockroaches have been used to cure illnesses and physical disorders for centuries.
More cockroach tea, anyone? Brewed from cockroaches, this tea has been used to treat dropsy--a kind of sickness or inflammation.
Next time you have trouble going pee, and your urinary tract just doesn't want to go with the flow, why not try dried and powdered Oriental cockroaches? They are said to make a dandy diuretic.
Eat too much pizza? Cotton candy? Thanksgiving dinner? Some people eat cockroaches fried in oil and garlic as a cure for indigestion.