Wednesday, 9 January 2013

Les Mis : An Obligatory Movie Review

...because I want to.

Les Miserables.


Walked into the cinema knowing absolutely nothing about the movie except that it was based off the insanely huge book that I never got around to buying.
I mean, just look at the size of it!


I did want to read it as a teen, when I was going through my READ ALL THE CLASSICS phase, 
but my mother was like it's a depressing story, you won't like it.
(she's sort of right...I love happy endings)

So yep.
Never read the book, 
probably did read the synopsis when I wanted to buy the book, but I didn't remember any of it, so.

To be quite honest, I wanted to watch the movie mostly because I wanted to finally know what the story was about.

I knew it was going to be a musical, 
but honestly, I expected there to be some dialogue.
There are like five sentences of plain dialogue in the entire movie! The rest is just singing.
Some of the songs are beautiful, 
but what annoyed me was at some parts they're just saying things to each other in sing-song voices...not properly singing; no tune, no proper melody...just singsong, 
which was annoying.
I mean, at least sing it to a proper tune, or just speak those lines plainly, in normal dialogue.

The story. ..or actually, the performances.
There probably will be spoilers in this post, so you're welcome to stop reading now.
(but honestly, its based off a book. What can I spoil? - quoting Aidan Turner here but yeah)

Oh, but spoiler : Everyone dies in this movie. 

The movie starts off with a song - Look Down, Look Down - which I quite liked.

Almost didn't recognize Hugh Jackman as the slave in the first scene!
Baaaaby :(

I absolutely love Hugh Jackman okay. 
Even despite being upset that he's married to an old woman that I'm insanely jealous of. 
But he's so adorable. And so handsome! *_*

Aaaand I'm digressing.

Then next, we see Russell Crowe. The rigid inspector with all his principles.

Cue annoying singsong dialogue.
At one point I was actually wondering "omg can Russell Crowe actually sing or not?" 
But then he has a song later on in the movie where he sings quite well, so...

So Hugh Jackman has done his time as a prisoner for stealing bread, 
but is supposed to be on parole for life, 
but he runs away and tried to start over from scratch - new identity and all that.

Then they cut to eight years later, where he is now the mayor of another town (way to not attract attention to yourself tho seriously)
And then we meet  Anne Hathaway! 

Poor girl who works in Hugh Jackman's factory, gets kicked out, has to sell her hair, becomes a prostitute to make money to pay innkeepers to bring up her get the idea.
I honestly wanted to be neutral while watching this movie, because everyone made such a big fuss about her performance..I thought it had to be good.
Goodness. She just is so completely annoying.

That song!..I Dreamed A Dream...okay to be fair, I thought she started it off really well, 

but halfway through she sounded like she was about to have an asthma attack, 
and it got really intense and over the top, 
and she had the weirdest facial expressions, 
and omg. wow. no.

To give her credit though, she did sing it live and all, 
her entire performance in this movie consisted of a whole fifteen minutes of completely over the top dramatic acting.

And then Hugh Jackman's character has to go and fall in love with her.

But then thankfully she dies. 
(no like really, everyone dies)

But anyway, 

aside from her, 
everyone else was pretty good.

Even the small girl who played her daughter could sing quite well.  


Okay, so anyway once she dies, 
Hugh Jackman feels the need to go save her daughter from the mean innkeepers who are bringing her up.

And then Russell Crowe tries to stop him, but he gets away again.

Helena Bonham Carter was the innkeeper's wife (actually didn't know she was in this movie) and was as crazy as ever.
But it fit her role so that was good.
And her husband!
He looked so familiar, and we were cracking our heads trying to think of who on earth the actor was,


Sufi : Omg I think that's Borat!
Me : What. No way, they wouldn't put Borat in this movie! Maybe someone who looks like him?

...turns out it was Borat
But I mean. Why would anyone put Sacha Baron Cohen in a movie like Les Miserables!?

But then again, he fit his role, 
and he can sing quite well, so I guess despite my misgivings, the casting was spot-on.

Okay, so Hugh Jackman takes the little girl (Cosette) away from them, 
and decides to raise her as his own child, 
but he must move to a different town again because now Russell Crowe is back on his tail.

 And then there's this song where Russell Crowe decides to sing about trying to catch Hugh Jackman...
...okay, I get that most musicals usually have a recurrent theme song, with different lyrics for different scenes, 
but seriously, 
they could have come up with one slightly different song.
I thought they should have at least made this song sound angry or frustrated or something.
Instead it really came off sounding like Russell Crowe was in love with Hugh Jackman.
So Disney Princess-y.


And then, nine years later!
Hugh Jackman and Cosette (Amanda Seyfried) move back into town (WHY. WHY. WHY YOU NO RUN FAR FAR AWAY SOMEWHERE)

And then we meet the innkeepers again,
And Eponine! (the innkeeper's daughter)
The girl who plays Eponine! Samatha Barks.

She's so pretty! And she sings really well. *_*
Girl crushhh.

Her song "On My Own" broke my heart :3

And her role!

Unrequited love ahhhh.
All the feels, man, all the feeeels.

There's this guy she's in love with, Marius (Eddie Redmayne, who, apparently the internet is raving about) who instead, falls instantly in love with Amanda Seyfried.

Like seriously.
He sees her from across the market place and falls in love immediately, 
and she looks at him and falls in love too.
I mean.
Even hindi movies aren't that bad!

And then they have a love song in a garden and Amanda Seyfried's singing is SO high-pitched ohmygod I had to cover my ears when she hit the high notes.

Then it turns out Marius is supposed to fight in the French Revolution, 

And then there was Aaron Tveit (who was the leader of sorts for the revolution),

who had such a wonderful role, really.

When he died, I almost cried. 
Moar feels :(

But they had a song before they were about to go fight....I thought that one should have been more angry and upbeat too, 
They were singing a ballad about going to fight.

Like seriously.

But anyway, 
there's the fight, 
and Aaron Tveit dies.
And I sniffled.
And Marius almost dies, 
but somehow Hugh Jackman found out that Marius and Cosette are in love, so he goes to join the fight and save his future son-in-law...which he does, 

and then there's this bit with Russell Crowe where Hugh Jackman spares Russell Crowe's life, 
and Russell Crowe doesnt want to be indebted to a criminal, 
so he commits suicide.

I sniffled at that too.

I mean.
He really didn't have to die.
Why couldn't he have accepted that Hugh Jackman was good? They could have had the most epic bromance ever!

But anyway.

There was this one bit before he dies where he goes to see the bodies of all the dead revolutionists, 
and among them is this small boy
(who really was so good in his role adorable! But he dies)

and Russell Crowe takes off his medal of bravery and puts it on the small boy and ...I cried.

All the emotions okay.

And then so Hugh Jackman saved Marius right, 
and then he brings him to Cosette, 
but then he doesn't know Russell Crowe already died, so he thinks he has to run again, 
but he entrusts Cosette to Marius, 

and then he apparently goes to live in the convent. the same town.

This man does NOT get the concept of running AWAY, seriously.

Marius and Cosette get married, 
and then they find out he's in the Convent, so they rush over, 
and he's dying...
..and then they sing for a bit..
...and he dies.

I cried some more.

The End.

In all honesty, the movie was alright.

I'd rate it like 6 out of 10 or something.
Some songs were really heart-wrenching.
Some were off. Didn't suit the situation.
Anne Hathaway was annoying.
Amanda Seyfried was annoying.
The singsong dialogue really should have been plain dialogue.

But otherwise, the movie was pretty good.
The other actors were wonderful.

The backdrop was so pretty!

 I think I would have enjoyed this much better if I had watched it as a stage play.

That was probably the idea...make it like a stage play - but as a movie.
Didn't quite work for me.

I guess in a proper stage play, you're right there.

You actually connect with the people singing.

This was a bit odd, because its a movie, and they sing everything.

The transitions between songs were a bit off also.
Like they suddenly break into song out of nowhere.
And the transitions between the scenes were a bit off too.

In a stage play it would have worked because they would dim the lights in between scenes and switch the props and all, 

but in a movie...its just weird.

And then suddenly eight years later, nine years later...

..they don't show us what happened in between, 
and it just seems that a lot of the backstory has been left out.

Now I want to read the book because I'm so unsatisfied with all the blanks in the storyline.

Will probably have to leave it for after exams though, 
but I shall read it!

Hugh Jackman was so asdlksjdkgsdjgh :3
...but of course I may be biased.

End of insanely long, rubbishy review. 


I shall leave you with this :

Kurt Schneider is such a babe. :3



  1. :-D You're funny!

    I never read it either and I probably never will. But your review. Great. :-)

    1. omg look at when I'm replying this! :(
      hehe. Thanks. Have you watched the movie yet?

  2. Personally I thought Hathaway's facial expressions and crying in I Dreamed A Dream was one of the best things in the movie. It always annoys me when people look so amazing when they cry in movies, because it's not realistic at all. Anne did it real. She was so fucking real. And that left me a sobbing mess.

    1. To be honest, I felt Anne Hathaway's crying during that sequence was a bit too much "ugly crying". I may be decidedly shallow, but I didn't like that scene at all. We're entitled to our differing opinions.

  3. So i watched the movie this afternoon with my friend. I think anne hathaway's crying is a BIT off,but i actually love her because she's singing and crying at the same time! But all of the characters,i think i love samantha barks character or eponine because even though she know that marius dont love her,she still sacrifices her life for him. aww. unrequited love <3

    1. I'm probably just biased because I don't like Anne Hathaway in general.
      But Samantha Barks! <3 Love love love her role, and her singing and that song...still breaks my heart.